+IMAGINE

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I have written more than a thousand posts (this one is the 1201 post to be exact) during the lifetime of this blog, but never so far have I titled one to match the frontispiece image – IMAGINE until now.

Looking toward the past, looking toward the future – my daughter is days away from the birth now of my 2nd grandson.  IMAGINE if that little one came into the world and had no people there to greet him?

And I mean that – children with people – without ‘a people’.

Readers who find this blog and resonate with its words know what that means just as I do – what it means to be born and raised – and then in one’s heart to feel forever more what it is like to always be lonely for ‘our people’.

I say that to myself today loud and clear in my inner places that give silent voice:  “I am lonely for ‘my people’.

Who are my people?  Where are my people?

I don’t know.  But if I did know, and I could find them, I would know THAT because this feeling I always have that I miss them would go away!

I know my people when they post comments on this blog – me and they, we – are one another’s people.  I feel that special connection when a special piece of vast empty loneliness is filled as I see myself reflected back in the words of my people.

Infants – from birth – are meant to see their own self reflected back to them by their caregivers, especially their mother – and their father – the infant’s people!

To be cared about and to be cared for – by our people.  Didn’t happen to those of us so terrorized, traumatized, and left so alone.

We HAD no people – or very few (I had no one – part of my specialty in life, I guess – but I had the Alaskan wilderness – which counts powerfully in my survival).

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Feeling alone in a crowd – said like some kind of familiar cliche – true not for everyone.  I don’t believe that it is.  Those who say it and know what this feels like – well, there’s no doubt something tragic in their early years – they had no people.

I am simply musing.  And imagining.  What would it be like if suddenly I FOUND my people as my people FOUND me?  Will I ever know in this lifetime?

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5 thoughts on “+IMAGINE

  1. I too am lonely for my people. Wow. You have given me the words for this feeling. This feeling led me down such a wrong road, because I didn’t understand that my people didn’t mean my family. My family aren’t my people at all. I don’t want to exaggerate how difficult things were for me. It wasn’t severe abuse, though I am left damaged and don’t think I will ever heal from the strange unloving I went through. But somehow I do find so much resonance in your writing. I really hope that you find more and more connection. I appreciate your writing so much.

    I wanted you to know I appreciated this post. Thank you x

    • You appreciating my post makes my heart happy – sorry for my comment making very little (other) sense! It is SO HOT here today, I think if melts the brain!

      Your family – generations and generations ‘this stuff’ has been going on — and it is changing slowly within many families – one lone warrior at a time (often) – Anything less than LOVE and safe and secure attachment to early caregivers is harmful!!!!! Suffering sucks. I am so glad for your company here!!! Mucho So!! xo

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