Possibly the most useful service my book can provide is to illustrate what is probably the WORST symptom of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD): The inability of a BPD mother to adequately and appropriately mother her own offspring. This #1 symptom can very easily and possibly usually DOES lead to a BPD mother neglecting and/or abusing her children FROM BIRTH.
I realize this might be a controversial conclusion that I will be making in my book, but given the profound damage a severe BPD mother can cause her children including SUFFERING nearly beyond belief these possibilities HAVE to be faced by a society who — by their own blissful ignorance — is harboring these mothers.
I fully believe that the Trauma Altered Development that a BPD suffered in their own earliest and most important stages of body-brain growth happens to improve a BPD survivor’s chances of survival to childbearing age. If this is true then there is ONLY ONE WAY to intercept the patterns of neglect and abuse that these same BPD survivors can inflict on the children that nature has enabled them to live long enough to produce.
This ONLY WAY is for the people who surround a BPD mother and her children HAVE to intervene on behalf of the children. These trauma-caused changes have been included within human DNA potential from our earliest beginnings to ensure survival of a species that needed all the offspring it could produce. That is obviously NOT still the case, but BPD survivors do continue not only to produce offspring but to also live long enough themselves to torment, torture and traumatize their own children.
Without intervention and treatment I do not believe that the most severely abusive Borderline parents have ANY CONSCIOUS CHOICE not to — on an unconscious and physiologically-programmed level – to be in direct competition for survival resources with these same offspring they have created. In the ‘olden days’ this simply related to a mother’s ‘natural mammalian right’ to kill offspring within an environment that was so malevolent and deprived that enough resources simply DID NOT exist to support ‘them all’ and ensure survival – mother included.
Of course in today’s world all these physiological survival-of-the-species patterns are worse than obsolete. They are abominations. These are the same patterns, I believe, that are at the core of the Medea story I mentioned in my earlier post today where this mother hacked her own children apart with a gigantic butcher knife. ‘The public’ and the father were given fair warning that this was exactly what Medea was going to do – and they did nothing to prevent the tragedy — not even while the butchering was happening as ‘society’ stood around outside the house listening to the screaming of the babies. These are the same patterns that operated on the deepest, most hidden levels within my mother’s interactions with me — and within the society that allowed them to happen at all.
If we are a more highly evolved species, then we need to act that way. Allowing these kinds of mothers to abuse and neglect their offspring IS A SOCIAL PROBLEM and only within this bigger picture will the solution to these problems be found. Again, neither these BPD mothers nor their offspring can resolve these difficulties alone. The physiological forces at work are very powerful, very ancient, and very, very dangerous to infants and children.
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